I almost didn’t get picked for TEDx.

My 60-second audition tape was—let’s just say—more riddle than speech.

Yeah it was deep stuff. 

But later I learned that the organizers nearly passed on me.  

Apparently, starting in the multiverse is… not everyone’s cup of tea. Who knew?

That forced me into a question I’ve wrestled with for years: How do you take vast, open-ended ideas—and make them simple, real, and useful enough for someone to carry home? 

Subjects that pull at the very nature of existence. 

I could have gone with the ‘Pump yourself up! Believe and achieve!’ style.  But then I’d have to ask… which part of yourself am I asking you to believe in?  

What I wanted was different. I wanted to give people a key—the kind that rattles quietly in the back of your mind until one day, when life presses in, you realize it unlocks a door.

That was the challenge of this TEDx talk for me. 

To take something as big as the boundaries of self and reality—and shrink it into six minutes. 

No sugar-coating. Just threads pointing to truths.

Hopefully I got close!

I also got to experience the full force of my nervous system trying to shut me down to avoid public failure. 

The whole defense system came alive—sweaty palms, dry mouth, blank mind.  

Not so much fun, lol.

When I was younger I used to be paralyzed by anxiety. 

I tried to hide it, but internally I was riddled with insecurity, doubt, and depression.  

The self-help techniques I tried were helpful, but nothing that truly lasted.

It was this work I’m doing now that changed everything for me. 

I had to undergo the process of realizing that I wasn’t my anxiety or my doubts—I had just identified with them.

In fact, that was all my identity really was.

But I had found a part of me that was separate. 

And once you see that inner character we all mistake for ‘me,’ you realize all it really wants is to keep things the same—because that’s ‘safe.’

For my identity, stepping on stage provoked those old fears. 

Not to sound cliché but here’s the shift: 

With this awareness, I could see those thoughts and sensations as simply passing through—without needing to call them mine.  

Just sensations of the body. And I don’t mean in theory, but as an undeniable experience.  

If I didn’t feed them with my attention, they lost their grip. 

Because it’s attention that fuses you to the thought, that makes you ‘identify’ with it. 

The moment you stay with awareness instead, the thought loses its power to pull you into fear.

That’s how I carried on: I didn’t follow them into the spiral. 

Instead of fighting anxiety, I let it be—as something separate from me. 

This talk was my attempt to poke at the status quo. 

To hint at the path I found—that the roles we play aren’t fixed truths, just patterns of the mind on repeat.

And that freedom isn’t later. It isn’t someday. It’s right here, right now.

It’s in moments like this.

This style of talk might not be for everyone, but I left a few “Easter eggs” tucked in there—lines that, if really absorbed, can completely shift how you relate to the parts of yourself that cling to suffering.

The talk just went live, so if you have a few minutes I’d love for you to watch it.  

Not because it’s “my moment,” but because it carries something I hope could genuinely help.

>>> Watch the TEDx Talk here

If you do, I’d love to hear if anything stuck with you?

Gratitude (and a few riddles),
Paul

Think you know someone that would be interested in this?

Just hit the link to share it with them

>>> Send to a friend 

View the archive

Want to revisit past newsletters?  Find them here.