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Most people assume they are the authors of their own desires.
But what if many of the things you think you want, (the chocolate cravings, the relationship obsessions, the relentless striving for success or power) weren’t truly yours at all?
What if they were echoes?
Echoes of your mother’s loneliness.
Your father’s resentment.
Your grandparents’ longing or unmet needs.
Old energy, still alive, living through you.
Find yourself in these words.
Read this as if it’s about you — because it is.
This might sound esoteric. But stay with me…
It’s not mysticism, it’s backed by science.
Neuroscience now shows that trauma can be inherited epigenetically.
Paternal trauma, for instance, has been found to be transmitted through sperm.
We are born into emotional energy lines, and those lines don’t just shape how we feel, they shape who we become.
In simple terms: emotions are energy.
Quite literally —they even shift the electromagnetic field of your body.
And DNA carries more than just biology.
It carries emotional tendencies.
It carries desires.
It carries forces.
Think of this inherited energy as an entity — a phantom of the past, hitching a ride inside you.
These energies create patterns.
Patterns that influence how you behave, who you’re drawn to, what you avoid, and even how you relate to food, love, power, or money.
They are the scaffolding that holds up how we become reflections of our parents — one that’s ready to be dismantled.
Most of us brace against these forces.
We distract. We overwork. We indulge. We explain away the urge.
But here’s the shift I want to offer you:
You don’t escape these inherited patterns by fighting them.
You escape by relaxing out of them.
When the desire to binge eat high-calorie food arises…
When the impulse to chase validation surfaces…
When the hunger for intimacy feels overwhelming…
Don’t react.
Don’t wrestle with the feeling (or even with the guilt of having the feeling again).
Just notice it. Observe it for what it is.
It’s just a feeling. A craving. An impulse. It isn’t you.
And then relax.
There is wisdom in the breath.
Center yourself.
Anchor into your body.
Feel the energy.
Let it rise… and let it go.
Because when you relax, you break the cycle.
The energy continues forward, but you don’t go with it.
In this relaxed state, we can find a new rhythm and build new patterns.
If you don’t fight with or indulge the feeling… if you allow it to exist, but just relax… the brain will soon get bored and move on to something else.
Our thoughts and emotions mirror each other, feeding one another in a loop.
When we feel them we often follow that current — letting urgency or anxiety drag us into its depths.
But feeling it doesn’t mean you have to follow it.
You don’t need to follow the same path your ancestors walked.
You don’t need to become your father, or repeat your mother’s heartbreak.
You can choose to complete the energy line rather than continue it.
Completing this is the most profound way to honor those who came before you.
That is the gift of awareness.
And that is the sacred responsibility of this work.
Not just to feel better.
But to end cycles.
To stop passing pain forward.
You are not broken.
You simply have inheritances.
But inheritance is not destiny.
And the moment you stop bracing…
Something deeper begins to unfold
Paul Vincent
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